Here I am, at this cross road again. I’m right where I was one month ago! Damn it. I have the same options, just that now, it’s much more complicated & but yet I have like one down. At least one of the option is tried-and-tested.

I know I know. There’s something terribly wrong with me. It’s like a quarter-life crisis! I know! How horrible! I’m too young for this. I don’t know what to do with my life anymore. I have too many options & too little options at the same time.

I don’t have an idea what I wanna do now. I know what I wanna do when I’m 30, but not when I’m 23. At 30, I wanna settle down & just take care of my family, meaning I want a stable job which gives me stable income etc.

But at 23, I’m too young & too bold for such a job. I’m so restless I can’t stay in the same position for long. Restless. Yes. I can’t do it. I wanna keep moving keep moving keep moving. I’m too young I don’t wanna waste my youth away.

Well, I don’t know what’s gonna happen to me. Maybe it’s all just some crazy thoughts & I’ll end up still walking the same path as I’m walking now, or maybe I’ll be packing my bag & travelling to the end of the world tomorrow. Who knows. I just wanna say that I’m very restless. & do not be shocked if I were to do some stunning moves such as tender 24hrs or if I decide to be a rock-singer. But no matter what, I hope to keep the positive aura around me. Meaning, you’ll be kick out of my aura if you are producing some negative-smelly aura. Get it?

After 3 days of MC, I’ve lost the kick to work tomorrow. Sucks. I feel like I’m back to my old job but with nothing to countdown to. I just need to restart my engine. I’m not sure if it’s a good thing that I took 3 days MC just after 3 weeks of work. I doubt so. But I was really sick. Down with bronchitis. & that’s a no joke. I can still hear my lungs breathing.

Why is it that we must have ups & downs in our life? Why can’t we just stay up all the time? I mean. It’s just unfair to have to suffer the downs just so I can have a little of that ups. Isn’t it? Other people may find it easy to get through it, but not me. I think I’m a born-negative person. Very pessimistic. I blame my genes. This makes me a very down person.

Whatever it is that I gotta do to keep myself up, I’ll do.

In 20 years, you are most probably gonna regret things that you didn’t do, rather than things that you did.

That’s an awesome saying. I agree to that. And I don’t want that. I wanna be brave.

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