A lot of theories did not pan out. But I have my bets on this.
If you know me, you talked to me before, and if I’m comfortable with you, I would have probably discussed this ‘Cat Lady’ theory with you. This is one theory, I wouldn’t joke about. It’s not exactly a theory, it’s more like, erm, a scenario that will befall on you if you are single.
Yes. That ‘Cat Lady’ theory. No offence to cat-lovers (I am fond of cats too btw), but this is true.
I came across this scenario while reading one of Haruki Murakami’s book. I forgot which one. But it is still deeply etched in my mind, this ‘Cat Lady’ thing.
Well, it’s very simply. The theory is: If you stay single, not get married, you are gonna become this creepy ‘Cat Lady’ who stays alone in an apartment, doors and windows shut all the time, all the neighbours’ kids are afraid of you, nobody wanna talk to you, they think you are so creepy, and one day, you’ll die of a lonely disease, or heart attack, or choke on food, just die alone at home, and no one knows about. Then your cat, who is trapped in the house, with no food, will start to eat you, eat your flesh, you face, and only after a few days when the smell gets out, then the police will be informed and by then, you will be rotting.
ISN’T THAT OMG!! DON’T YOU WANNA JUST GET MARRIED ASAP SO YOU WON’T DIE A LONELY DEATH AND GET EATEN UP BY YOUR CAT!!
or dog, if your prefer.
Anyway, my point is, nobody wanna be the ‘Cat Lady’. Yes we know all about the ‘Career Woman’ and all the independent-crap but all in all, nobody should end up as a ‘Cat Lady’.
I’m gonna find myself a love now. And so should you!
P.S: Point of entry is to tell you about ‘Cat Lady’ and how we should describe sick old virgin irritating auntie as ‘Cat Lady’ and hope they do get eaten up by their cats someday.
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