life will be as good as playing sushi go round everyday.

(btw, u can play it too at

just finish my nights and having a long weekend as well as nice week-long leave:) life is sooooooooooo great not working. not fucking working.

let’s talk about my boring night.

apart from getting really constipated, bloated, acne break outs, nausea every minute, lose of appetite, really bad dark circles, lost of interest in social life, damn tired every waking and sleeping hour, really crazy mood,

night is really just fine.

and you know what makes everything worse? its the stress. the stress that any moment, the hp’s gonna ring and we’re gonna receive a trauma activation or neuro case and we’re all screwed up. forced to pump your adrenaline although you’re at the verge of vomiting and farting every minute. its that bad.

but thankfully, this night has been great :)


during the night, one of my colleague (colleague means i don’t like her and she can’t be my friend) discover this website which initially amazed us, but at the end when i googled it (and realise that we’ve all been cheated by damn colleague) it was really just a website to cheat your friends.

not funny. made us all feel stupid.



btw, i dreamt about ouyang having a baby yesterday and we were carrying the baby around happily going for movie. and the baby was tiny. like a doll. haha. but everyone love him! yes its a HIM. omg i really cant wait for one of us to have a baby!


ok gotta go sushi go round.

my Haruki therapy

have you ever read books from Haruki Murakami? you should.

to me, i can read them hundreds of times but never get sick of them. they’re like therapy to me. a way to calm me down. strangely. and i’ll get totally absorbed into the book that i feel like im in the book, in the scene, watching everything, everyone, every character. im suck into it. i could read on and on and on, on my bed, and i will never get bored.

his books are different. they’re not like the typical novels you pick in the library. they’re more like non-fiction. yet they’re fiction. he would write his stories in metaphor yet seems so real. you could understand every single word.

if i were to be a writer, i would wanna be like him. i would wanna write books like his. i hope he will continue to write more books.

he is a Japanese. he doesn’t write like those typical novels. he is so different. it always make me feel calm after reading them.

no doubt my favourite author.


i was born the youngest in my family. but i nv think i behave like one. i always think im assuming the role of the big sister (which i really am) until yesterday did i realise that im just really the youngest baby in the family.

it took me so long to realise that my roof is collapsing. that i should expect that one day when i look up, i will see the sky the rain falling on me. guess it has been months. but i was just living in my la-la land.

life is too tough and im too young. i can’t handle some thing this tough. im barely 21. but now is not the time to be the baby. because if i fall, i know no arms will be there to hold me. there’s no one for me to depend on now. and in fact, im the one being depend on for support.

i feel that im so young. i can’t do it. im barely there. how can i handle such crisis. how can they put such burden such responsibility on me. yet i can’t runaway.

there was once when i told someone who wanted to runaway with me that im not like others, i have nothing to runaway from. i have a good family i have no worries. but now, the only thing in my mind is to runaway. it may be selfish of me, but honestly, selfish everyone is. including them.

my sister remained calm throughout. maybe she is old enough. maybe two years down the road and i would have react the same. or maybe she simply doesn’t care.

anyway, my roof is collapsing.






omg can hardly catch my breath now! finally after much anticipation and disappointments, i’ve booked my virgin trip to melbourne. can hardly wait man. but its in oct. like.. 4 mths away and i have no idea why am i so excited now.

guess i should start being excited in like sep or what.

anyway, i don’t feel like working already. im already on holiday mood:) oh whatever. cruel reality will just bring u back on earth. and make u go work like a slave everyday.

we’re all slaves of money. money is devil. and we’re all worshippers of it.

gees. i sound so satanic. anyway, today is monday is i skipped work by taking mom to see doctor. so my week is cut short by one day. i still have tue, wed, thu, fri, sat to go before my off day on sunday. typing it already make me feel tired. can hardly wait for my leave in end of june. though going nowhere cus of swine flu. but still will plan and make thigns happen! like a hotel stay or what. maybe a chalet? but its school holidays. and everywhere will be crowded with irritating know-nothing kids. can’t stand the sight of them. ignorant beings living carefreely using money without knowing where do money come from breathing air without knowing we’re facing global warming eating without knowing where will the food go. IGNORANT BEINGS! shd be banished from surface of the earth. fuck.

oh well. i talk too much sometimes.


motive of this entry is to show off that I AM GOING MELBOURNE IN OCT!!!

maybe many people have been there before. but im going with my own money own transport i even booked the ticket myself using my own card and deciding everything my own! im an adult!

my own money!




ooooh and btw, i only fly EMIRATES. how about that?



%d bloggers like this: